Terran Agreements with the Emissaries and the Masters of the Ring
The first steps toward human/alien contact,. (Beautiful, ain't it?) The agreements will be finished by the end of January. They include the following:
Universal Culture: This will become a required class in the educational curriculum until Terrans can better acclimate themselves to the prospects of living among alien beings. Professions, businesses, and others which might have contract with those sent by the Masters of the Ring will have their human resources departments and other professional organizations offer classes, courses, or material that will cover the high points of what is offered in the curriculum.
This will be binding on all UN signatories with an exception made for the United States, which will allow the individual states to determine whether or not Universal Culture will be taught as a course.
Interlac: Schools will begin the teaching of the universal language known as Interlac. Education will begin in elementary school and continuation will be left up to the students when they reach the middle school level. The United Nations will work with the Masters to provide on-line education where available, but some countries without access to inexpensive and dependable internet might be delayed until enough people become reasonably fluent.
This will be binding on all UN signatories with an exception made for France and the United States, which will only teach Interlac as an elective course.
SIDE NOTE: Of course, people will start learning all of the Interlac curse words immediately, including the Six Dirty Words. Interlac doesn't technically have curse words, but does have something called a 'negative amplifier' which technically could turn any word or phrase into a "curse word". Furthermore, most of these come from longer phrases or verb tenses where the first syllable is broken off to become the curse word.
foob - someone so stupid as to be beyond belief. A dumbshit.
frak - an expression of biological disgust. The expletive "fuck!" but in Interlac the source phrase is not related explicitly to sexual intercourse.
grife - an expression of great misfortune. "God dammit!"
nass - excrement from a sentient species. "Shit!" (Although among species who speak Interlac, it also has a neutral meaning of "something having no value". This is also the only word that isn't a slang term but a direct translation. "It's dirty only when you pronounce it dirty.")
sprock - referring to one of many sexual transgressions, including rape and incest. "Motherfucker!" Sprock is much worse than frak as an expression.
squaj - something or someone utterly worthless.
In the future, it will be said of Legionnaires that "they all curse like merchant spacemen".
University of the Earth: A University of the Earth will be founded on Terra, and Stage One will initially be meant for the sharing of information between the Terran government and any Emissaries which will be sent by the Masters of the Ring. Stage Two will be a full-scale educational exchange, with scientific information to be shared only with extreme caution. Stage Three will found the academic university which will be run under the control of the United Nations.
Terran Institute for Police Science: Member governments have agreed for the foundation of a specialized police force containing 10,000 volunteers that will have arrest power in any country they are deployed to for a specific and limited set of crimes that all member governments believe are arrestable offenses.
The goals of the new Police Science Force will be to
* develop non-lethal weaponry to enforce the law with an aim to providing a proportionate force against opponents armed with lethal or deadly weaponry.
* the gathering of intelligence against international crimimal organziations
* the mastering of computer intelligence and artificial intelligence as tools in law enforcement
* the understanding of scientific interrogation techniques which elimimate brutality
* the development of methods to respond rapidly to crime
* the study of criminology and incarceration and the psychological issues related to each
Universal Culture: This will become a required class in the educational curriculum until Terrans can better acclimate themselves to the prospects of living among alien beings. Professions, businesses, and others which might have contract with those sent by the Masters of the Ring will have their human resources departments and other professional organizations offer classes, courses, or material that will cover the high points of what is offered in the curriculum.
This will be binding on all UN signatories with an exception made for the United States, which will allow the individual states to determine whether or not Universal Culture will be taught as a course.
Interlac: Schools will begin the teaching of the universal language known as Interlac. Education will begin in elementary school and continuation will be left up to the students when they reach the middle school level. The United Nations will work with the Masters to provide on-line education where available, but some countries without access to inexpensive and dependable internet might be delayed until enough people become reasonably fluent.
This will be binding on all UN signatories with an exception made for France and the United States, which will only teach Interlac as an elective course.
SIDE NOTE: Of course, people will start learning all of the Interlac curse words immediately, including the Six Dirty Words. Interlac doesn't technically have curse words, but does have something called a 'negative amplifier' which technically could turn any word or phrase into a "curse word". Furthermore, most of these come from longer phrases or verb tenses where the first syllable is broken off to become the curse word.
foob - someone so stupid as to be beyond belief. A dumbshit.
frak - an expression of biological disgust. The expletive "fuck!" but in Interlac the source phrase is not related explicitly to sexual intercourse.
grife - an expression of great misfortune. "God dammit!"
nass - excrement from a sentient species. "Shit!" (Although among species who speak Interlac, it also has a neutral meaning of "something having no value". This is also the only word that isn't a slang term but a direct translation. "It's dirty only when you pronounce it dirty.")
sprock - referring to one of many sexual transgressions, including rape and incest. "Motherfucker!" Sprock is much worse than frak as an expression.
squaj - something or someone utterly worthless.
In the future, it will be said of Legionnaires that "they all curse like merchant spacemen".
University of the Earth: A University of the Earth will be founded on Terra, and Stage One will initially be meant for the sharing of information between the Terran government and any Emissaries which will be sent by the Masters of the Ring. Stage Two will be a full-scale educational exchange, with scientific information to be shared only with extreme caution. Stage Three will found the academic university which will be run under the control of the United Nations.
Terran Institute for Police Science: Member governments have agreed for the foundation of a specialized police force containing 10,000 volunteers that will have arrest power in any country they are deployed to for a specific and limited set of crimes that all member governments believe are arrestable offenses.
The goals of the new Police Science Force will be to
* develop non-lethal weaponry to enforce the law with an aim to providing a proportionate force against opponents armed with lethal or deadly weaponry.
* the gathering of intelligence against international crimimal organziations
* the mastering of computer intelligence and artificial intelligence as tools in law enforcement
* the understanding of scientific interrogation techniques which elimimate brutality
* the development of methods to respond rapidly to crime
* the study of criminology and incarceration and the psychological issues related to each
I don't know about the rest of the Legionnaires, but once Karen hears about this "Terran Institute for Police Science" she's gonna want to be in on it—in other words, she's gonna want to be a "Science Cop!"
ReplyDeleteAs it turns out, my long term plan was to unfold parts of UNCLE into the Science Police. So Karen already has a head start!
DeleteThere's going to be organizations that will forever resist assimilation and be independant entities. There will always be UNIT (or they will be among the last to be absorbed), whereas the U.S. Marshals Service will one day become a international organization known as 'Fugitive Retrieval' (and have their own time/dimensional-travel capability). The SP's will be the dominant LEO agency planetwide, I see.
DeleteThree things.
ReplyDelete1.) The Ringmasters/Corps have a special non-profit humanitarian agency which they place on lower-tech worlds such as Earth - the 'Silver Circle Foundation'. They would be the front line for teaching Universal Culture courses (they act in the same way as the Peace Corps does), as well as the main point for introducing the lower-level 'altech' solutions and devices (such as 'manna' and 'homesteader's stones') to the general public.
2.) There's one more word to that list (really, it had to be seven). That last word is 'reslavah'; it means 'filthy vermin'. It's a Sirian term that filtered its way into Interlac as a common-language term everyone uses.
3.) At TIPS (you meant for that acronym to be used, didn't you?), the training personnel will be composed of one-half Terran staff, and one-half of Corps personnel - the bulk of which will be members of the Corps Security/Protection Division, who act as law-enforcement and civil militia in areas under Corps influence.
Info on the "Silver Circle' (it's never referred to as the 'Foundation') and CSPD can be found on the Daria Wiki.
I deliberately chose it to show how unworkable it will be. TIPS is likely to be palindromed into "SPIT" and TIPS will soon end up going by its colloquial name - the "Science Police"!
DeleteDon't forget the vilest, most vulgar curse word of them all—Belgium!
Delete'Reslavah' also refers to something so vile that you wouldn't/couldn't eat it. The Sirians are a reptilian-humanoid race that prefer to comsume their foods live but will kill and eat their meals (they have a rep for treating mammalian-humanoid races as food sources), and anything so vile as to be considered unpalatable is 'reslavah'. Ironically, Terran rodents are considered delicacies for them. They love common house mice (a treat like popcorn or potato chips), Norway rats (a food staple since they were first learned of and imported from Earth centuries ago) and nutria (treated in the same manner as turkey on Earth - as a holiday feast tradition).
ReplyDelete